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Thursday, November 27, 2008

SOME JOKES TO LAUGH

Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch in Bonita Springs , doing nothing. One lady turns and asks, 'Do you still get horny?' The other replies, 'Oh sure I do.'
The first old lady asks, 'What do you do about it?'
The second old lady replies, 'I suck a lifesaver.'
After a few moments, the first old lady asks, 'Who drives you to the beach?'


**********************************************************

Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home in Ft. Lauderdale reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny. > >
The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece.
The third old lady remarked, 'I can't hear a word you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about.

**********************************************************

A little old lady was sitting on a park bench in The Villages, a Florida Adult community. A man walked over and sits down on the other end of the bench. After a few moments, the woman asks, 'Are you a stranger here?'
He replies, 'I lived here years ago.'
'So, where were you all these years?'
'In prison,' he says.
'Why did they put you in prison?'
He looked at her, and very quietly said, 'I killed my wife.'
'Oh!' said the woman. 'So you're single...?!'

**********************************************************


Two elderly people living in Ft. Myers , he was a widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years. One evening there was a community supper in the big arena in the Clubhouse.
The two were at the same table, across from one another. As the meal went on, he took a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered the courage to ask her, 'Will you marry me?'

After about six seconds of 'careful consideration,' she answered 'Yes. Yes, I will!'
The meal ended and, with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places. Next morning, he was troubled. 'Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?' >
He couldn't remember. Try as he might, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her.
First, he explained that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he inquired, 'When I asked if you would marry me, did you say ' Yes' or did you say 'No'?'
He was delighted to hear her say, 'Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart.' Then she continued, 'And I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me.'


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

A man was telling his neighbor in Miami , 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.'
'Really,' answered the neighbor. 'What kind is it?'
'Twelve thirty.'


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor in Estero to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.

A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
'Just doing what you said, Doc : 'Get a hot mamma' and 'be cheerful.'',Morris replied.
To which the doctor said, 'I didn't say that, Morris. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur, be careful!'

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

A little old man shuffled slowly into the 'Orange Dipper', an ice cream parlor in Naples , and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.
After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.

The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'

'No,' he replied, 'hemorrhoids'


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

POOR CHRISTMAS?

Well, finally i almost recovered from the flu i got. I am ready to strangle again for life, to work hard and to live my life like shit again. Why am i talking like that? The answer is money. They are never enough. It 's all about the money. When bills are coming at home i have a huge headache. Surely i am not the only one on this planet with money problem but what can i say when the money i earn from work are enough only to pay the bills and to to buy the very basics for food? About amusement? Forget it! No money at all. The only fun i can have (and the most people on earth) is my internet connection, my tv set, my cds and a coffee in the coffee shop once in three weeks. Pathetic huh?
Can you imagine the scene in a few weeks? Happy songs, Santas on every corner, and lots of ads for Christmas. Don 't forget something: no money, no funny! Don 't do the huge mistake to get a loan from a bank 'cause after holidays you are gonna be so, so, soooooo sorry! Trust me.
So here 's the thing: No money for the most people means quiet holidays but not necessarily bad. To not have enough money doesn 't mean shitty Christmas. Get the real Christmas spirit and not the one that companies wanna sell to us very expensive.
Personally what am i gonna do during the whole Christmas and New Year days? Nothing special. Stayin' at home with my fiance, visiting my parents, no parties, no turkey (chicken is also ok), lot of wine and music at home and two or three times to go out for food, coffee, beer or whatever. My pocket keeps me in low profile.
Don 't forget there are many people who have the absolute nothing. No clothes, no food, no home, no kids or kids without parents, old people all alone in some nursing home. There is always somebody in worse place than us, so sometimes we must be greatul for what we have in our lives.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

LETTER TO A BANK

Look what i found today in my mailbox from a friend of mine.

LETTER TO A BANK:

Dear Sirs,

In view of what seems to be happening internationally with banks at the moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. If one of my cheques is returned marked "insufficient funds," how will I know whether that refers to me or you?


Yours truly,


Ain 't it cool?

Monday, November 10, 2008

TOOTHACHE

HOLY SHIT!!! I 've just come back from dentist and i have an un-fucking-believable toothache. Painkiller is not working at all. What should i take to stop the pain? Prozac? cocaine? Weed? What kind of crap? Just tell me and i am gonna get it for sure. I really don 't know how i 'm gonna sleep tonight.
"You 're gonna be very lucky if you are not in pain tonight", dentist told me. EXCUSE ME? You made my day. Actually, you made my night dentist, thank you.
I should take out the nerve of the tooth. Damn it! I don 't wanna swear so much on my blog but the pain makes me to cuss. It 's one way to calm down.
I know the pain is not gonna last forever and that makes me kinda strong and patient. Toothache is one of the worst things for me ever. I can 't stand it. I hate all kind of pains. I prefer to work like a dog twenty hours a day everyday than the torture of a toothache (i surely don 't mean it).
FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How am i gonna make pain to stop? Any advise please? Shit, it kills me so much.
Alrighty folks! I better get going. There 's nothing serious to say today, so i am gonna close now and suffer...
SHIT!!!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

SEE THE WORLD

I like traveling. I like to visit other countries, to meet other people, to learn about other cultures. Of course i can 't afford so many trips. I 've found one very interesting web site and i thought to share it with you.
I am talking about EMPORIS. It 's a web site where you can visit many cities all around the world. You can see very beautiful images, read the history of each place, to check out for the highest buildings in the world, to learn some elements like population, culture etc.
Emporis lists on its database 209 countries. The web site is in two languages. English and Deutsch. Emporis is one of the world’s biggest providers of data concerning the building industry.
If you are excited with this web site and you are looking for a job you can work for Emporis. More informations you can find with one click here.
This web site is a very good tool for architects and civil engineers but it doesn 't mean that it 's not for other people also. As i said in the beginning of this post it 's an alternative way to see the world. I can 't say it 's better than the real thing but it 's better than nothing for sure.

Friday, November 7, 2008

MOODY & LAZY

Today is Friday. My vacations are getting finished and on Monday i gotta go back at work. I really don 't know how i 'm feeling. I have mixed emotions about that. I can 't say i did something special on my vacations. I 've just relaxed and i 've got bored.
I am glad that i go back at work 'cause my time will be not so empty. On the other side i must wake up early in the morning everyday and my supervisor will bust my balls without specific reason.
Ain 't it crazy? I know i am not the only one who feels like that in occasions like this. For two weeks i was lazy as hell and now (in three days actually) i have to be vivid like a soldier. I hate that.
The only good think is i have to get three more weeks of vacations before 2009 enter in our lives. So... it 's gonna be kinda easier for me the time i 'll spend in my "loving" job.
Anyway. I guess i have nothing special to say today (maybe 'cause i am a bit moody) so i think it 's better for you and for me to split.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

SO FAR, SO GOOD, SO WHAT?

Ok folks! Obama is the winner. So far, so good, so what? I saw on tv people were crying. Tears of happiness. Alrighty! Do you really believe that one guy can make the difference?
The only good thing for me is finally a black guy is the president in the U.S.A. Don 't forget a politician is always politician. What means that? He will lie, he will spend money for nothing, he will take care of rich people first and he will not have so much time for the daily problems of the ordinary people. There is no-one politician who is saint. If you know someone, anyone from any country just inform me. I would really like to know.
One more thing. Don 't forget that only one president of the U.S.A. got not involved in a war. I don 't remember his name right now. I hope Barack Obama will be the second. I say i hope because i am 100% sure the wars are made from companies and not from presidents. Politicians are just the vitrine.
I cannot say i am happy for Obama 'cause i haven 't see anything yet from him. I 'll have opinion about him in the future. I can say i am happy that John McCain THE VETERAN lost. Big time!
Cheers!!!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

AMERICAN ELECTIONS

Finally the elections in the U.S.A. are gonna finish soon. I know not only the American citizens but the whole world is tired with these elections. It 's unbelievable how many many have spent so far. Who is gonna be the winner? Barack Obama or John McCain? I think the one who is gonna prove he is the most popular (and most celebrity also). Marketing is gonna be the big winner for sure.
Personally i prefer Obama 'cause i 'd like to see a black guy as the U.S.A. president and this is gonna be a huge step for all the Afro-American citizens. I don 't believe American troops will go off from Middle Asia so soon. The policy which America follows in international issues will be the same. I don 't expect big differences.
John McCain has the "quote" MAC IS BACK. Oh, my God! Do you really believe that a seventy years old guy has so much energy to govern a big country? Come on! And Sarah Palin as a vice-president? No thanks. The only think i can believe for her is that she' s gonna be president of the U.S.A. in a less than four years time. Why? John McCain is seventy years old and everything is possible (it 's not black humor, it's a possibility). What is Sarah Palin gonna do if she 'll be a president? She 's gonna give more guns to Americans and she will send more soldiers in Middle Asia to fight terrorists and all the bad guys. You know what means that, don 't you? She will spend more money to fight against everybody and the economy will go downhill.
I think Sarah Palin wants to continue what George W. Bush did. Really, what did you expect from a guy with a name like that (Bush)?
On the other side is Barack Obama. Many people believe that he has a vision. Alright! I prefer Obama than John the veteran but i still don 't believe he can do the big difference. Don 't forget that behind politicians there are big companies and they expect many things form the president and the vice-president.
I am European and not American but i 'd like to say to American citizens to not do the same mistake like they did in 2004 with George W. Bush.

Monday, November 3, 2008

CHANGES

Very often people (including myself) are nagging for the high bills we pay. About electricity, fuels, the prices in super markets, banks and many other things. Sometimes we cannot take it any more and we are desperate. We say our life is in misery and money are never enough. That 's truth. The big truth but...
...But we can do some changes to improve our lives. It 's not right to sit and wait for a miracle. We must strangle for the best. We can be more sensitive with environment. We can use alternative energy sources like solar power. We can have recycle as a goal in our lives. We will see results. Not right away but we will see for sure. The benefits will be appeared in our pockets and in environment.
One more thing we can do to not spend so much money, is to be less consuming. It 's not necessary to buy whatever new gadget, cell phone, car or purse comes out in the stores. I mean we must be less fashion victims.
Nowadays things are difficult (don 't forget the crisis we are into) and the future doesn 't seem so bright. Things are going to be worse. It 's my opinion. Maybe i am wrong and i wish for that but...

Sunday, November 2, 2008

IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE

We are in the middle of the financial crisis and Christmas are coming. Ain 't it ironic? This is a global phenomenon. How many people will find difficulties to celebrate Christmas? The answer is many!
Thousands and thousands of people are losing their jobs because companies prefer to move somewhere else, mostly in Asia, in areas where people don 't count like human beans. They work a lot and they are getting paid with nothing.
If this crisis continue for a long time i think people will be transformed to animals. They will not take it any more. The history makes circles. The same situations come again and again after some years. I read in a newspaper that if this financial crisis will be continued, in many countries we will see revolutions. Many people believe revolution is the only way to have some better days. Don 't forget what happened in Argentina some years ago.
I think we are in the middle of nowhere. For me all these things are one big political game. Nothing else.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

THE BEGINNING

Well, this is the beginning! I really don 't know what to say. This is my first blog in English language. Let me introduce myself. I am greek. Born in Sweden but now i am living in Greece. I have one more blog in greek language, so if anyone of you is greek or knows the greek language you can visit it if you click here. I like rock, blues and jazz music, i like reading books, technology (i am not tech - freak but i think i know many things), movies, photography and i love traveling.
In this blog i am going to expose my thoughts about everything. I will share with you all the weird, bad, funny and good things that happen in my life. Believe me i have so bad luck that i think i am cursed or something (just kidding).
You are all welcome in this blog and your comments also. If you have any ideas feel free and contact with me to share them (if you want).
Well, that 's all so far. See ya soon!